I’m My Own Grandpa (Random Things That John Tells Me)
Over generations, this quirky habit has persisted. My parents did it (mostly my father), and now I do it too. We hum or sing random tunes, and the words are so peculiar that you find yourself asking your parents, or your kids asking you, “Is that a real song?”
So this happens often with John. Without a doubt after hearing so many weird songs he comes up with, this was one that I just had to learn more about.
So the title of this song is, “I’m My Own Grandpa.” Apparently, it was inspired by something written by Mark Twain.
“I’m My Own Grandpa” (sometimes rendered as “I’m My Own Grandpaw“) is a novelty song written by Dwight Latham and Moe Jaffe, performed by Lonzo and Oscar in 1947, about a man who, through an unlikely (but legal) combination of marriages, becomes stepfather to his own stepmother. By dropping the “step-” modifiers, he becomes his own grandfather.
In the 1930s, Latham had a group, the Jesters, on network radio; their specialties were bits of spoken humor and novelty songs.
While reading a book of Mark Twain anecdotes, he once found a paragraph in which Twain proved it would be possible for a man to become his own grandfather. (“Very Closely Related” appears on page 87 of Wit and Humor of the Age, which was co-authored by Mark Twain in 1883.) In 1947, Latham and Jaffe expanded the idea into a song, which became a hit for Lonzo and Oscar.
In the song, the narrator marries a widow with an adult daughter. Subsequently, his father marries the widow’s daughter. This creates a comic tangle of relationships by a mixture of blood and marriage; for example, the narrator’s father is now also his stepson-in-law. The situation is complicated further when both couples have children.
Although the song continues to mention that both the narrator’s wife and stepdaughter had children by the narrator and his father, respectively, the narrator actually becomes “his own grandpa” once his father marries the woman’s daughter:
- The narrator marries the older woman.
- This results in the woman’s daughter becoming his stepdaughter.
- Subsequently, the narrator’s father marries the older woman’s daughter.
- The woman’s daughter, being the new wife of the narrator’s father, is now both his stepdaughter and his stepmother. Concurrently, the narrator’s father, being his stepdaughter’s husband, is also his own stepson-in-law.
- The narrator’s wife, being the mother of his stepmother, is both the narrator’s spouse and his step-grandmother.
- The husband of the narrator’s wife would then be the narrator’s step-grandfather. Since the narrator is that person, he has managed to become his own (step-step)grandfather. The “step-step” concept applies because the step-father of one’s step-mother would be one’s step-step-grandfather, making a “double step” event possible.
The song continues with
- The narrator and his wife having a son.
- The narrator’s son is the half-brother of his stepdaughter, as the narrator’s wife is the mother of both.
- Since his stepdaughter is also his stepmother, then the narrator’s son is also his own (step-half-)uncle because he is the (half-)brother of his (step-)mother.
- The narrator’s son is therefore a (half-)brother-in-law to the narrator’s father, because the son is the (half-)brother of the father’s wife.
- The narrator’s father and his wife (the narrator’s stepdaughter) then had a son of their own.
- The child is the narrator’s (step-) grandson because he is the son of his (step-)daughter.
- The son is the (half-)brother of the narrator because they share a father.
A proof that a man may be his own Grandfather.—There was a widow and her daughter-in-law, and a man and his son. The widow married the son, and the daughter the old man; the widow was, therefore, mother to her husband’s father, consequently grandmother to her own husband. They had a son, to whom she was great-grandmother; now, as the son of a great-grandmother must be either a grandfather or great-uncle, this boy was therefore his own grandfather. N. B. This was actually the case with a boy at a school in Norwich.
An 1884 book, The World of Wonders, attributed the original “remarkable genealogical curiosity” to Hood’s Magazine.
In 1989, The Rolling Stones bassist Bill Wyman married Mandy Smith; she was 18 and he 52. In 1993, Wyman’s 30-year-old son from his first marriage, Stephen, married Smith’s mother, Patsy, who was then aged 46. However this was after Wyman and Smith had divorced.
Now if that wasn’t silly enough, I’ve learned there are some real life situations when this has occurred.
According to a 2007 article, the song was inspired by an anecdote that has been published periodically by newspapers for well over 150 years. The earliest citation was from the Republican Chronicle of Ithaca, New York on April 24, 1822, and that was copied from the London Literary Gazette:
A proof that a man may be his own Grandfather.—There was a widow and her daughter-in-law, and a man and his son. The widow married the son, and the daughter the old man; the widow was, therefore, mother to her husband’s father, consequently grandmother to her own husband. They had a son, to whom she was great-grandmother; now, as the son of a great-grandmother must be either a grandfather or great-uncle, this boy was therefore his own grandfather. N. B. This was actually the case with a boy at a school in Norwich.
An 1884 book, The World of Wonders, attributed the original “remarkable genealogical curiosity” to Hood’s Magazine.
In 1989, The Rolling Stones bassist Bill Wyman married Mandy Smith; she was 18 and he 52. In 1993, Wyman’s 30-year-old son from his first marriage, Stephen, married Smith’s mother, Patsy, who was then aged 46. However this was after Wyman and Smith had divorced.
So without further ado, Here is the song, I just know you’ve been waiting for:
LYRICS from MUSIC MATCH
Now, many many years ago
When I was twenty three
I was married to a widow
Who was pretty as could be
This widow had a grown-up daughter
Had hair of red
My father fell in love with her
And soon the two were wed
This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life
My daughter was my mother
‘Cause she was my father’s wife
To complicate the matters
Even though it brought me joy
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad
And so became my uncle
Though it made me very sad
For if he was my uncle
That also made him the brother
Of the widow’s grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was my step-mother
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
My father’s wife then had a son
That kept them on the run
And he became my grandchild
For he was my daughter’s son
My wife is now my mother’s mother
And it makes me blue
Because, she is my wife
She’s my grandmother too
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
Now, if my wife is my grandmother
Then, I am her grandchild
And every time I think of it
It nearly drives me wild
For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw
As husband of my grandmother
I am my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
